And the favourite accessory in the house goes to...


Love is...

Heard this on the radio...

"A couple was on a motorcycle, travelling at a speed of 100kmph. The girl asked the guy "Could you slow down a little? I'm scared". The guy said,"Tell me you love me, then I'll slow down". "I love you". But the guy didn't slow down. The motorcycle went a little faster, and the girl said, "Could you slow down?" And the guy told her again. "Give me a hug first". And she gave held him real tight. Then he said, "Do one last thing for me. Take off my helmet and wear it, and this time, I will slow down". The girl did as he said.
The next morning, the news read, 'Couple on motorcycle crashed into building. Girl survives'. Seems that he found out that the brakes were not working and had no way to slow down the motorcycle.

Wrong timing..


Aargghh... just realised that I missed the playoffs by a month!!


I hate speeches...

Wonder why they always arrow me to do speeches. Everyone also got degree. Everyone also graduate. Everyone also can read and write. Everyone also got do composition and comprehension in english during their schooling days. But why I always kana speech writing? I also dunno. Maybe I got nerdy look. Or maybe my head got "Pick me!" sign. Dem. I hate speech writing.

My compositions used to be on Indiana Jones like stories with people flying all over the place, eating monkey brains and saving a girl from a giant gorilla like monster. Now I got to write politically correct things that have to do with stats and way forward and lessons learnt. Its like asking a truck driver to ride bicycle. Or a 'kuay tiao mee' seller to sell 'soon kueh'.

After a gruelling 1.5 minutes... I finally churned out a brilliant speech for them and hopefully, this
would be the last speech they'll ask me to write.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Good Morning.

Everyone should know what accidents are. If you all can remember, we have so many accidents. In xxxx (I cannot remember the actual date), we had so many accidents starting from NH and followed days later by FP. It was very scary. I thought many people died, but they say only one Singaporean died, so not so bad.

So we are here today to learn about the accident. We dunno what happen, but it’s a catastrophe. Like something nobody wants to happen, but happen anyway. But we must learn from it. If we dun learn, it will happen again, and we don’t want it to happen again. So how? We review what happen and don’t do the same thing. We do everything differently and hopefully, the same accident won’t happen.

I think everyone here is capable and intelligent. No one here dunno how to read right? Later on we will give out some reading aids for everyone, just to make sure. Wait…. the lady below the stage say dun have reading aid. So…… we will assume that all of you can read.

Later on, got some people will talk to you about safety and other things. So you just listen. Listen and learn. And if can, jot down some notes to share with your family and friends. Share with them on what not to do to avoid accident at home. And if they contractor, maybe they can also send to their boss, and their boss will learn. If every one day one person learn, in one year only, 365 people will learn. And if say 10% of people are accident prone, then we would have already saved 36.5 people's lives, 36 people round down.

Ok. I think I impart too much knowledge aredy. You guys just get prepared to be safe…or be sorry. I will now pass you to the rest of the not so important people to impart some of their knowledge to you.

Good night and thank you.

Cable

The carpenter came over to settle the bill, and while we were having a casual conversation on how the study should look like, we went to the topic on how the cables would be hidden. The lady looked at me and asked 'why got so many cables'. And I said 'cable modem, router, power supply, antenna'. She looked at me with a queer look and said, isn't the modem and router supposed to be in the living? You want it in the study? So I had to confess, that I hadn't managed to configure the wireless router and that pc is now connected to the internet directly thru an ethernet cable connected to the modem (yes, I don't know what that means). So I asked her how she did it, and she told me that her brother configured it. As usual, being thickskinned, I asked if her brother was available (to configure the pc la). She said she would get him to pen down a few notes on how it is done and send it over via email.
Later in the night, I took out the manuals for the cable modem and router, went to a couple of websites and yahoo answers... and guess what... I am now blogging this from the room!! (In case u dun know what that means, it means I got the router up and running la).

Top 10 ideas for things to do when you feel bored...

1. Surf your friends blogs.
2. Go facebook and zap, hit, sell, buy, race, fight, build all your friends. If you have extra time, poke and superpoke everyone on your friends list.
3. Think of something u'd like answered. Wiki it. Then yahoo answers it. And if you're still not satisfied, search for a related forum and make a post in the forum. Then sit patiently and wait for someone to answer it.
4. Catch an old movie u missed on http://www.watch-movies.net/
5. Experiment on different ways of making fried rice i.e. vary the salt, no of eggs, etc.
6. Find an instrument in your house, pick it up and try to compose a song. If u don't have an instrument, just whistle.
7. Bite your fingernails.
8. Locate the person on your messenger or msn list that u least speak to, click on him/her, and try to initiate a conversation.
9. Clean the house.
10. Post a blog post!!

HR Memo

This is pasted on the wall of the coffee shop beside Rendang Corner.

To all Employees:
Effective TODAY

Dress Code

1. It is advised that you come to work dressed according to your salary. If we see you wearing Prada shoes andcarrying a Gucci bag, we assume you are doing well financially and therefore do not need a pay raise.
2. If you dress poorly, you need to learn to manage your money better, so that you may buy nicer clothes, andtherefore you do not need a pay raise.
3. If you dress just right, you are right where you need to be and therefore you do not need a pay raise.

Sick Days

We will no longer accept a doctor's certificate as proof of sickness. If you are able to go to the doctor, you are able to come to work.

Holidays

Each employee will receive 104 personal days a year. They are called Saturday & Sunday.

Compassionate Leave

This is no excuse for missing work. There is nothing you can do for dead friends, relatives or co-workers. Every effort should be made to have non-employees attend to the arrangements. In rare cases where employee involvement is necessary, the funeral should be scheduled in the late afternoon. We will be glad to allow you to work through your lunch hour and subsequently leave one hour early.

Toilet Use

1. Entirely too much time is being spent in the toilet. There is now a strict three-minute time limit in the cubicles.
2. At the end of three minutes, an alarm will sound, the toilet paper roll will retract, the cubicle door will open, and your picture will be taken.
3. After your second offence, your picture will be posted on the company notice board under the 'Chronic Offenders'category.
4. Anyone caught smiling in the picture will be sanctioned under the company's mental health policy.

Lunch Break

1. Skinny people get 30 minutes for lunch, as they need to eat more so that they can look healthy.
2. Normal size people get 15 minutes for lunch to get a balanced meal to maintain their average figure.
3. Chubby people get 5 minutes for lunch, because that's all the time needed to drink a Slim-Fast.

Thank you for your loyalty to our company. Remember we are an employer of choice and we are here to provide a positive employment experience. Therefore, all questions, comments, concerns, complaints, frustrations, irritations, aggravations, insinuations, allegations, accusations, contemplations, consternation and input should be directed elsewhere.

A new home...

I'm out of Villa Verde, and finally shifted in to the new house. It's pretty empty now, and it sure does feel wierd staying alone in such a big place. I guess staying with others isn't that bad after all. It gives u a sense of company. And having so much space, it takes time to get used to.

Well, on the brighter side, I can now buy the huge can of milo and store it in the kitchen, rather than drinking 3 in 1s. I can make maggi mee, without worrying about the landlord being unhappy with me dirtying the kitchen (heck I even bought eggs). I have cartoon network on tv most of the time. And I now have a fixed line! (haven't got the time to buy a phone yet though). We even made teppanyaki for dinner.

I guess owning a house isn't all that bad. It's tiring getting everything in place, buying stuff and making sure things are ok. But I guess after all this is done, we will have a nice home to stay in.
This is where I'll be sleeping tonight..

Promotion!

Was at an electronic goods store today, looking for microwave ovens, when we came across this sign. Price now is $359 + u get to get $220 cashback, meaning that u only have to pay $359 - $220 = $139. Everything seems fine, except that the usual price is $98? Meaning that, if u waited for the promotion period to be over, you'd probably be able to buy it for $41 cheaper!!

Interesting Read

Especially like the kesho jizo. Beats plastic surgery. Link


IT Illiterate...

Was attempting to get the router up for a couple of hours, up till the time I gave up and decided it was time to call the technical service number. I gave them a ring and a guy picks up the phone. I asked him "internet connection not found" and he said "no problem, we will fix it".
So we started the whole series of 'god knows what I'm doing'.

1) First off: Power off the cable modem and shutdown the pc. Restart the pc. Open internet explorer and go to a site. Can access? NO
2) Next click 'start' and 'run'. Type 'cmd'. At C:, type ipconfig and press enter. See anything? Yes. Type ping http://www.yahoo.com/. Anything happens? NO SIGNAL
3) Click 'start'. Type ipconfig/release. Type ipconfig. Type ipconfig/renew. Now ping again. Anything? NO
4) Close everything. Shut down everything. Change the ethernet cable and repeat 1-3. Anything? NO
5) Close everything. Shut down everything. Now see a small hole behind the cable modem? Poke and hold for 10 seconds. After its reset. Repeat 1-3. Anything? NO
6) Call Starhub. Tell them the cable modem is faulty. Then call me back.

After going through that tedious process, I felt a bit like an idiot. I took a look at the modem box, opened it, and found a CD in it labelled "modem installation CD". Dawned on me, that I am a bigger idiot than I realise.

Old lessons..

This morning, while having breakfast, a friend joked that I was finishing every strand of beehoon left on the plate. It was then, when he joked about it, that I remembered what my grandma used to tell us. "Finish your food clean. Any remainder on the plate would be how the skin of your spouse would look like".

From young, we believed that, and made sure that whatever food is given to us is finished clean. We never queried the validity of the statement, or rather was too young to. We just did as was told, being afraid of what might really happen to our spouses.
Fast forward 20 yrs, and I guess that it was lessons on virtue that was being thought to us. Fact was that no kid would listen to an adult to finish their food if they were just told to do so. Add some myth or tale in the story and it becomes a habit. Now that I'm 30+, it's funny that subconsciously, I still follow what I've been thought when I was young.

A Simple Day

Woke up late. Went for a simple lunch, then went to Tampines to look at paintings. After that, went back to my home and did some cleaning. Saw a little bit of TV, rested a while, and then went out to ta pao 'bak kut teh'. Had dinner while watching TV. Saw TV till 9+, then drove back to the room to sleep.

Sigh, tomorrow is a working day again..

Red Cliff

Go watch it... it's not bad. Though it's the first of a 2 part series. The 1st part ends before the fire ships were sent.

The actual history can be found at http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Battle_of_Red_Cliffs. Warning though, spoilers ahead!

Prime Mover...

Let's see... My off work job description has increased... from chauffer cum kuli cum escort cum cleaner cum financier... to include prime mover!!

Oh well, this is not the first time I've moved everything from one place to another. Just that today marked the inaugural shifting of the 2,000 ton digital piano!! Well, actually, I really don't know how much it weights, but it sure as h3ll weights a lot!! Feels like carrying two TV sets...one on each hand, when i was maneuvering the piano from the 3rd floor of my rented room to the car and from the car to my new place. I think I tore some tendons while lifting it. Even the car suspension felt as though it was about to give way when i drove it there.

Finally, got the danged piano up to the study room, and its back to working condition. Wont be able to use it for a while, up till next week, when i finally shift in.

And oh... the coffee table, bedhead and egg chair are all in... whats left, other than the dining table, is the sofa...which will probably be here in 6 weeks.

Yaay!!! Cable!!

Yaaaaaay!!!!!

Got the Basic Tier for 4 channel groups and added on



Considering that I now have



I think I will be home most of the time from now on...

And with



haha...you guys wont be able to find me during the playoff season!!!...

ERP = Everything Raise Price!!!

ERP prices are getting ridiculous. Added with the hike in petrol prices, sooner or later, we might all have to walk to work!!!

Piano..

Something from a Jap drama....



Pardon the quality...haven had much practice on this..

Yawn...

Was driving from Bukit Batok back home. Along the Bukit Gombak stretch, there was roadworks all over, and most of the cars ended up in single file. Traffic lights turned red, and my car was behind a van.

Half way waiting for the traffic lights, I fell asleep and my leg started leaving the brake pedal. The car inched forward, till it touched the van in front, which instantaneously woke me up. Was half expecting the van owner to come out and hurl curses at me. I reversed the car a little, and noticed that no damage was done to the van. Instead of stopping, he drove forward, turned left and then sped off. Good thing for me was that the only thing that had any signs of damage was some cracks on my car number plate.

Moral of the story, don't drive when you're tired. Or have someone continuously talk or sing to you when you're sleepy. Or set your car to 'Park' when it's stationary. Rather get horned for being slow to move off than having to get the car assessed, file a report and then get the car repaired.

Desktop Tower Defense 1.5

After you're done with version 1.0, go to version 2.0. It's like going from Diablo 1 to Diablo 2.
Apologies though, was not able to extract the swf, so this has to be played online. Link

Score of 5369 on medium... 'clean desk badge'

Word Verification..

Doesn't that look like a mispelled 'teehui'?


Habit...

Colleague has an inherent bad habit on taking other colleagues phones and capturing pictures of her kid. I mean, being proud of your kid is one thing, but making sure everyone else has a picture of the kid in their phones is something else. She's a really cute kid, but I pity her when she grows up. Every tong, dave and hairy is gonna have her pic man.... and dun ask me who is hairy, u know who u r..

A little mocking bird?

As I was driving to work, this bird just flew near and stood on the side mirror of my car for the longest time; long enough for me to take out my camera and capture multiple shots of it. Perhaps its an omen. Anyone knows what it signifies? Perhaps it was trying to tell me, "I can predict that your car is gonna have some bird droppings in a short while"..

Amusing...

Life is just so amusing at times. It brings u up when u least expect it, and it throws u down when u're unprepared. I guess this happens to everyone. We're only human, and there's bound to be ups and downs in life.

At times I wonder, why people work so hard in their lives and then not live to see the fruits of their labour. Why people spend so much effort in their jobs, only to feel unappreciated. Why people try so hard to be concerned of others, only to have others scoff at them. And perhaps, why people try so hard to reach a destination in life, only to find no roads at the end.

I presume that its inherent in us so called humans to want to strive for something in life. Some people strive for money, to be able to have a better life. Some people strive for power, to reach a better position. Some people just want recognition for their efforts. All these just seem so important to us at some point of time.

There are moments of sanity, when we see that everything we do is probably in vain. If you sit back once in a while, you'd notice that none of the things you've done actually mattered. No amount of hard work or effort is going to change the way things work out. No amount of labour or time is going to change the way people think of you. No amount of money or achievement is going to make you really happy.

Perhaps one lesson in life to learn, is not to be concerned with what you want or have, not to be concerned with what other think or feel about you, not to be concerned over menial things that mean so much to everyone today, but mean nothing tomorrow..... but only to know your own self worth and 问心无愧... don't you think so?